Have you been robbed of security?

Unexpected tragedies can rob us of our sense of security. When we experience a great loss, such as a divorce or a death of someone important to us, we can feel like we are no longer safe and secure.  Our sense of security and our whole “safe” world was ripped out from under us.  It can feel frightening.

Yet feeling secure is what will give us the ability to get up again, to step out into the world and try life again.  

Security is a basic need. Before we can thrive we must feel secure.

So what do we do when we don’t feel secure yet some part of us wants to move toward joining the living again. How do we stop the fear from winning over our natural instinct to live?

Until you feel secure again, you can pretend you feel secure. You can imagine feeling secure.  

Our body does not know the difference between reality and imagination. So if you think of a time you felt secure and go into the feeling of it, your body actually feels and believes it is secure.

If you are feeling fear, notice it. Name it. Say to yourself, I am feeling fear and I want to feel secure. Then close your eyes and ask yourself, what does it feel like to feel secure? What happens in my body when I feel secure?  Do I breathe deeper (try breathing deeper)… do my face muscles relax (allow your face muscles to relax)… do my shoulders drop down (drop your shoulders gently down a notch)… do I smile  more (smile softly)?

Remember a time you felt secure and see how your body reacts when you think of that time and being secure. Stay in the feeling as long as you can. 

Move back into life slowly testing the waters one toe at a time.  And imagining your way there.